(excerpt from The Cracked Mirror..by Vikee)

Feeling Unseen and Unknown

I am married to a man who does not truly know me, despite the fact that we have been together for over twenty-five years. He believes he understands who I am because of our long history together, but in reality, he does not know me at all. He is unaware of the things that bring me to tears, make me laugh, or trigger my anger, frustration, or happiness. The emotional aspects that shape who I remain invisible to him.

The Experience of Invisibility

In our marriage, I feel unseen and overlooked. He never actually looks at me; instead, he looks through me. His understanding of me is limited to a single observation—that I do not need him. This sense of invisibility makes the relationship feel empty, frustrating, and profoundly sad.

Emotional Impact

Living with this constant feeling of being unnoticed has left me feeling like nothing more than a shell of a person. The lack of recognition and emotional connection within my marriage has caused me to feel hollow and insignificant.

Finding Myself Again

Working Toward Change

But now I am working on me. For seven years, I tried to be someone I wasn’t, sacrificing my true self in hopes of fitting into a mold that never felt right. I am not a puppet, nor am I merely a piece of flesh to be manipulated or disregarded. I refuse to be talked down to, ignored, or ridiculed.

Acknowledging My Emotions

Throughout this journey, I have experienced a wide range of emotions—anger, bitterness, and feelings so intense that I pray daily for solace and peace of mind. These emotions are real, and they shape my experience of living in invisibility within my marriage.

Realizing the Need for Change

What I have learned from being married and feeling invisible is that nothing will change unless I take steps to change it myself. My circumstances will only be different if I make them different. The peace I long for in my marriage cannot be found until I am out of it.

Seeking Renewal and Hope

I am mentally exhausted and angry, burdened by loneliness. To move forward, I must find a way to rediscover who I am. I will no longer view myself through the cracked mirror of a distorted figure. Instead, I choose to stand firm and place my trust in my Lord and Savior to guide me out of the pain I am experiencing. I believe He will deliver me and make me new.

For those who are feeling invisible and tired of looking in a cracked mirror, know that  God understands and will deliver us from the hand of the enemy. He knows what we need. I didn’t get married to be invisible and I won’t continue to take the time I have left on this earth, for granted. I need to let go, let God and move on.

Embracing Faith and Moving Forward

For anyone who feels invisible and weary from seeing only a distorted reflection of themselves, it is important to remember that God understands our struggles and will deliver us from adversity. He knows exactly what we need, even when we feel lost or unseen. I did not enter marriage to become invisible, and I refuse to spend the remainder of my life taking my time on this earth for granted. It is time for me to let go, trust God, and move forward, embracing the hope and renewal He offers.