Footsteps To Freedom

It is IPV (Intimate Partner Violence) month. The number of deaths and incidents are rising all over the country. There are studies to show that intimate partner violence leaves lasting traumatic issues long after the violence is over. We still have people who believe it is the woman/man’s fault they are killed or maimed This matter is not going anywhere, and therefore we must strive everyday to change the narrative when dealing with domestic violence.

There have been milestones made to change laws about domestic violence and how it is interpreted in the laws. In the 1980’s, according to The University of Baltimore Law Review article called “Who Turned Out the Lights? How Maryland Laws failed to protect victims of domestic violence from a third-party abuser. The definition of abuse was confined to 1) causing serious bodily harm, 2) placing another in fear of imminent serious bodily harm, or 3) sexual abuse of a child”. The 1980 statue only protected a “household member” who was defined as a spouse, blood relative, or step relation if the members resided together when the abuse occurred. Individuals who were not married could not be protected under the 1980 Act. Moreover, the duration of the order was minimal to say the last. A temporary order only lasted for five days, and a subsequent final order lasted for fifteen days, including the time the temporary order was in effect. Laws like this only reflected that people thought that abuse was temporary.”

Thankfully, the laws have changed over the last few decades. But even with the new laws, women and children are still suffering from abuse.

Sometimes we do not understand the severity of a crime until there a face or a name to the victim. We hear the stories but until there is a name or face shown, people do not react.

I will not minimize the victims or the loved ones that were left behind:

Debbie- 38 years old-murdered and found in the basement freezer one year after her boyfriend told authorities she left him for another man. Debbie left behind three children

Raquel-25 years old-murdered, body found in Clyburn Park, boyfriend never arrested (police officer)

Tonya-35 years old-shot dead on the courthouse steps on Harford Road. Left behind two small children

Patricia (survivor)

Lisa-44 years old- Shot dead while running from abuser. Left one son behind.

Michelle-51 years old (survivor)

The list goes on and on

I wish there were no stories about IPV. I wish there were more survivors than victims of this crime. Yes! It is a crime! Sadly, there will always be victims because people do not get the help they need, or never received any help for their own problems. It is quite easy to project pain on others and blame others for our own insecurities. But until laws change, and women are viewed as people and not property to be owned and controlled. This list will continue to grow.