Footsteps To Freedom

Why is it when people fight, they yell at the top of their voice? It is because the louder they yell, the more they think they are right. Yelling does not mean you are right; all it means is you are incapable of controlling your emotions. Most abusers have a knack for making you feel like the worst person in the world. Especially if you already have low self-esteem or self-worth. How can you love and hate someone at the same time? STUPID, DUMB, WHORE, NOT MARRIAGE MATERIAL! You are nothing without me! Yelling these words at the top of their voices. But did you say you love me?

If you are going to fight, fight fair! Do not be abusive! Do not be so empty inside that you have to make others feel less than you! I said this in one of my blogs before- You are mean because you are angry, and you are angry because you are hurting, and you are hurting because you will not get the help you need to stop the hurt you are carrying. It is not her/his fault that you are hurting, and he/she should not be the brunt of your pain.

You are hollow inside and the beat of your heart frightens you. When you hear it, it reminds you of all the times you have broken someone else heart with your voice, with your words or your fists. You break things and you break people because you are angry and refuse to get the help you need to fill the hollowness. Never get in relationships or get married if you are still hollow. If you know you have unresolved issues, do not drag anyone along with you so you can have a punching bag.

Learn to understand that you deserve the best. If you do not trust-leave, there is not foundation without trust. If your communication is always hostile-beware, it is a sign of immaturity and unresolved hurt, If the behavior is controlling, remember you oversee your life and how it turns out. If there is frequent lying, know that lying is a symptom of various personality disorders, including antisocial, narcissistic, and histrionic personality disorders. If the relationship is all give and no take- stop being an asset in his/her life when you are a liability in theirs. If the relationship is draining you and you must make excuses for your partner’s behavior, it may be time to move on.